Happy Epiphany!

Published in the Idaho State Journal and Blackfoot Morning News week of January 1, 2012

I hope everyone had a great 12 days of Christmas!  If you were celebrating Christmas old-school, you’d be at the end of nearly two leisurely weeks of visiting family, opening gifts, and eating, drinking, and being merry in general.  The 12 days of Christmas ends on January 6 and the holiday of Epiphany.  Also called 3 Kings Day, Epiphany commemorates the arrival of the Magi with gifts for newborn Jesus.  It can be celebrated by taking down Christmas, doing something special for twelfth night, or leaving straw under your bed for the Magi’s camels in exchange for little treats.   

The origins of the word Epiphany mean “to manifest,” “to show,” or “reveal.”  The Magi revealed the divinity of Jesus on Epiphany.  Fast-forward a few thousand secular years, and the Merriam-Webster dictionary defines epiphany as (1) a usually sudden () perception of the essential nature or meaning of something (2) : an intuitive grasp of reality through something () simple and striking (3) : an illuminating discovery, realization, or disclosure.  What a wonderful thing to celebrate!    

An epiphany, breakthrough, sudden insight, or a-ha moment is an experience that makes us feel better, sets our mind at ease, answers a question, or points out a direction.   The 12 days of Christmas includes New Years Day and New Years resolutions.  Perhaps you can make a resolution to be an epiphany-seeker along with the other goals on your list.    

What flashes of insight would you like to experience this year?  What do you hope to learn about yourself?  How can you set yourself up to accidentally figure something out?  Whether it’s being braver in the face of challenge, asking bolder questions, examining your positive core, or taking a risk, 2012 is as good a year as any to seek a little personal enlightenment.  Are you guaranteed that epiphany?  No.  Do some things never get answered?  Yes.  But living a life of self-examination and cautious bravery is reward by itself, and you never know what might happen.

Another way to celebrate Epiphany might be to experiment with being a catalyst for someone else’s epiphany.  Maybe you should call that person who’s been on your mind all year.  What if you called them at their perfect moment?  Their “out of the blue, at just the right time” moment?   What random act of kindness might make someone’s day particularly bright?  An extra-big tip, $5 at the register for the next customer’s purchase, knocking on a neighbor’s door with cookies.  Or, have January 6 be Meaningful Quote Day—where you hand out some of your favorite quotes to friends, coworkers, or family.      

Sometimes epiphanies are once or twice in a lifetime experiences.  Sometimes epiphanies rain down like a meteor shower.  Some are examined, many are ignored.  Every year is a clean slate—what do you want it to look like at the end?  What is in your control to change, and are you in the mood for change?  Hopefully, you are not only making resolutions and setting goals on December 31.  Change and self-improvement is an active, year-round process.  What you resolve to do in January must be re-examined in April, July, October, weekly, monthly, or daily.  If it’s personal enlightenment you seek, be sure act accordingly year-round, and may it be a great year.   Onward!  

Nancy Goodman is a licensed counselor with an emphasis on life and career coaching.  Nancy can be reached at 208-406-3234 or goodnanc@yahoo.com.  http://vocatusidaho.blogspot.com. 

Finding Joe, Finding You

Published in the Idaho State Journal and Blackfoot Morning News week of October 2, 2011

It is my hope that with the release of the film “Finding Joe” by Patrick Takaya Solomon starting on September 30, more people will be able to find themselves.  Joseph Campbell, the subject of “Finding Joe,” found for us the common thread that leads the way to a better life and our most authentic selves. 

Joseph Campbell explored and explained the blueprint for the human condition; the words, diagrams, dreams, stories, legends, religions that interconnect every individual human being on the planet.  That map, within our collective psychological hard-drive, he called the Hero’s Journey. 

As a writer, speaker, consultant, and professor of Comparative Religion at Sarah Lawrence College, Campbell drew up the basic story, or “Monomyth,” that is the Hero’s Journey.  Which, once you understand it, you see everywhere.  Because it’s the story we see in most films, fiction, religion, comic books, myths and legends, with the same central character—you.

We are the person at the center of all those stories.  Those adventures happen to us.  Those challenges happen to us.  We encounter the same roadblocks and villains.  We are the hero in our own story—so how do you want your story to end? 

Campbell describes the formula, which is really pretty simple.  Follow the path that is the scariest one imaginable for you, if you haven’t already been forced upon it.  Which is the road that leads into the darkest and creepiest parts of the forest?  That’s the one you take.  There is a reason why these roads are typically the ones less traveled; who wants to die from fear? 

But Campell also shows us what happens next.  We meet allies.  We are greeted at the gates of the unknown.   Whether it’s wand-shopping in Diagon Alley, finding a ride at Mos Eisley Cantina, or tap-dancing with Munchkins at the start of the Yellow Brick Road, we are quickly shown we are not on the journey alone. 

Not that it’s ultimately any less terrifying.  After the Prancing Pony is Mount Doom.  And how do you survive the journey, to make it where you want to go?  In the story of our lives, how do we leave our abusive partner?  Start that business?  Cope with losing a job?  Follow your bliss, as Campbell said? 

Through “ trials and revelations,” Campbell states in his interviews with Bill Moyers in  “The Power of Myth.”  We have experiences along the way, good and bad, that teach us something about ourselves.  We learn we have hidden strengths.  We learn we’re smarter than we thought.  We grow stronger and more resilient every time we pick ourselves off the floor, no matter how hard we fell.  “Where you stumble, there lies your treasure,” Campbell says. 

There’s great reward in getting to the end of the journey and claiming our treasure, except there’s usually a huge dragon guarding it.  That smelly, snarly, lethal animal is our ego.  It’s us getting in our own way.  So, how do we evolve emotionally to claim what we deserve?  Letting go, building trust, asking for help, making important changes.  And, having faith. 

As long as we are alive, there is light at the end of every darkness.  And that light, often times, is coming from a disco ball at the huge party of your better, bigger life that waits on the other side of your scariest thing imaginable.  Campbell explains we all have the strength and stamina for our own heroic journeys, and we can rely on stories of humankind to point the way.  Onward!  

Nancy Goodman is a licensed counselor with an emphasis on life and career coaching.  Nancy can be reached at 406-3234 or goodnanc@yahoo.com.  http://vocatusidaho.blogspot.com. 

 

The Spirituality of Fisher-Price

Published in the Idaho State Journal and Blackfoot Morning News week of July 3, 2011

The other day, I started playing around with my baby’s Chakras. Chakras are, for those who believe, energy centers/channels that line up along the human spine and head—starting at our tailbone and launching off the top of our noggin into the heavens. This exercise in my kitchen was inspired by the pyramid-of-colored-plastic-donuts-on-a-stick toy. Come to find out, my baby is quite adept at balancing these plastic rings all over her body while laying on her back. For like, 10 seconds, she had the blue and yellow rings balanced on her forehead before she got distracted by the cupboard and flung them off.

The ring stack itself is organized with the biggest, blue ring on the bottom, followed with smaller rings of green, yellow, orange, and red, like a rainbow. But on my 6 month-old baby girl, laying there with her vast, un-imprinted consciousness and her mystic and physical energy flowing up and down and all around perfectly inside her body, I tried to arrange the colors to best align her for the life’s adventure of keeping that system organized and healthy.

The green ring sat low on her tummy. Green represents the earth, terra firma, Gaia. On grown-ups, this lowest Chakra at our tailbone is that which grounds us, reminds us of that biological, global connection. Further up her belly was orange—because orange is the only color that we eat. We don’t eat anything called a yellow, we don’t eat anything called a purple. Orange, in our ring-balancing game, represented that which physically nourishes the body.

Right in the middle was red. Now, when I was playing with this classic toy many, many years ago, this smallest ring was a solid red. In the new millennium version, half this ring is red, and the other half is clear, revealing a swirly, shiny design with plastic beads that rattles when it is shaken.

The center of the body, approximately our torso area, is sometimes referred to as our “power core;” where we feel emotions, where we have “gut” intuitions, where our heart beats and spirit lives. So this spangly, bright, center ring is my baby’s good stuff—who she knows herself to be, and where she connects with whatever transcendent force lives beyond her fairy eyelashes and tiny toes. Since she’s maybe 2 feet long at the moment, this red ring also covers her mouth—where she voices her opinions about her senses, often sounding like a Pterodactyl.

Then we have the blue and yellow rings, in succession. The yellow ring on top is what the red ring wants to connect with. This yellow ring is our inner light, it is life and illumination, it is what lies beyond, it is God, it is Nirvana. And in-between is the largest, blue ring—for the vast, blue sky. Ideally, that sky is crystal clear, and the red and yellow rings have no problem being aligned with each other. But sometimes, as grown-ups, that sky gets dark and polluted, and our bright, bedazzled selves lose sight of who we are and where we want to go. This will happen to my child at some point, it happens to everyone.

But hopefully she’ll absorb the lessons of the plastic donuts, and live a life that is tall, energized, and balanced. And when she does flip or jerk, and the colors scatter all over the place, hopefully she’ll know that she’s got what it takes to get everything back in order—which is also true of everyone. Onward!

Nancy Goodman is a licensed counselor with an emphasis on life and career coaching. She can be contacted at goodnanc@yahoo.com or 208-406-3234. http://vocatusidaho.blogspot.com.

Light vs. Darkness

Published in the Idaho State Journal and Blackfoot Morning News June, 2011

“Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our greatest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” Marianne Williamson

In conversations about fear, and what there is to be afraid of, there’s always the notion that people can be afraid of such things as success, happiness, or stability. And there are lots of self-sabotaging strategies that can be employed to ensure we aren’t successful, happy, or calm. We can do big things, like being attracted to mean people or always being late for a great job, or we can do smaller things—like procrastinating, cheating on a healthy diet, or staying in our comfort zones. What does it mean to be afraid of doing well, and why do we do it?

One thing that comes to mind when I think of why I might be afraid of my own “light,” is the possibility that my greatness can fall apart at any moment. That everything I’ve built up is so fragile that one false move, one mistake, and I’ve ruined it all. Sometimes fear comes from thinking “OK, I’m brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous—now what? How do I stay fabulous? Am I as fabulous today as I was yesterday? What if I do something un-fabulous?” It’s almost as if my awareness of my assets is enough to disassemble them.

It can take a lot of work to step into our own light and stay there. By stepping into our own light, we acknowledge our strengths, connections, accomplishments, and talents with calm permission and acceptance. It’s not about being better than anyone else; in fact, most people with self-esteem issues are lucky to feel equal to anyone at all. The assumption of Williamson, and many others in the field of psycho-spirituality, is that everyone—every living person—has lightness and brilliance, just waiting to be acknowledged. It’s there, whether we want to enjoy it or not.

Staying in our light means changing our assumptions. We want to assume we are loved for who we are, not the details of what we do. We want to assume that everyone is perfect and imperfect in unique ways and for unique reasons. We want to assume that setbacks are information guideposts and nothing more. I recently heard the quote “falling on your face is still moving forward.” Sometimes brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous people have missteps and bad days. But these mistakes don’t change anything about who we are at the core.

It can be as hard to see in bright light as it is to see in total darkness, but our eyes adjust accordingly, and the view is miraculous once we get used to it. So shine, play big, and stay connected to your inner greatness. Onward!

Nancy Goodman is a licensed counselor with an emphasis on life and career coaching. Nancy can be contacted at 208-406-3234 or goodnanc@yahoo.com. http://vocatusidaho.blogspot.com.

Earth Day

Published in the Blackfoot Morning News, April 2011

Earth Day is upon us. Every April 22, we focus our attention to the state of our environment. We learn the reduce-reuse-recycle options. We learn how to better conserve our water. We plan neighborhood gardens, explore solar energy, eat organic, and walk barefoot in the grass. April 22 is about protecting the Earth.

As if the Earth needs our protection. The idea that we need to protect the earth and environment has long seemed silly to me. The environment will survive us. We are puny carbon-based life forms spreading like a cancer across the terra firma, with no real end in sight, it seems. But are we more powerful than the natural forces on this planet? I doubt it.

When I think of the Earth’s resiliency, my imagination floats to the bottom of the ocean. Perhaps you’ve seen the pictures—strange, luminescent fish and other creatures, thriving miles below the ocean’s surface. Can humankind cause enough damage that will reach those depths? Even if we manage to blast and outbreed every form of life on the surface, what of these “Gaia’s reserves” living far beyond our reach? Perhaps the fish swimming around the wreck of the Titanic today are the elephants and orangutans of tomorrow. Perhaps the microorganisms hanging out by deep sea volcanos will someday, a bazillion years from now, evolve, rise up, and flop themselves on the shore of a brand new world. A world that has finally shaken us off.

I don’t know what we’re doing here on this planet. I just know it’s a blessing to live in this small cocoon that somehow sustains us in the infinite, cold void of the universe. We have the responsibility of being stewards of the environment, and we also have the brain power to do it right. But when it comes to environmental issues, it seems you are either preaching to the choir or preaching to a brick wall. There are those who recycle and leave no trace and monitor their carbon footprint, and those who throw garbage out the windows on the highway and see our natural resources as a genetically-altered cash cow. We humans, wherever we come from it seems, manage the environment like a rowdy 6-year old—much better at breaking and destroying things, and quite grumpy at the thought of having to clean it all up.

Earth Day is about cleaning up the environment, and it can also be about cleaning up our act. Sometimes, we have to control what we can and let the rest go. By changing ourselves we change the world—at least the little worlds we live in individually. So what little changes might you want to make—what garbage would you like to take out once and for all, what thorough cleansing is long overdue? Happier people make healthier choices, and how can a day celebrating the beauty of this planet be a catalyst for a cleaner, gentler frame of mind?

Whether you visit an environmental fair, resolve to buy local produce, or spend a day hiking in the woods, Earth Day is a great opportunity to ponder the miracle and mystery of life. This planet is alive; Gaia naturally recycles, naturally restores, naturally sustains. We each, individually, share this immense power—we can initiate change, and tap into the endless supply of intellect, creativity, and spirit for the betterment of ourselves and those in our orbits. If enough people did that, what an environment we would create. Onward!

Nancy Goodman is a licensed counselor with an emphasis on life and career coaching. Fumbling Toward Serenity currently runs every other week. 208-406-3234, goodnanc@yahoo.com. http://vocatusidaho.blogspot.com.