Light vs. Darkness

Published in the Idaho State Journal and Blackfoot Morning News June, 2011

“Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our greatest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” Marianne Williamson

In conversations about fear, and what there is to be afraid of, there’s always the notion that people can be afraid of such things as success, happiness, or stability. And there are lots of self-sabotaging strategies that can be employed to ensure we aren’t successful, happy, or calm. We can do big things, like being attracted to mean people or always being late for a great job, or we can do smaller things—like procrastinating, cheating on a healthy diet, or staying in our comfort zones. What does it mean to be afraid of doing well, and why do we do it?

One thing that comes to mind when I think of why I might be afraid of my own “light,” is the possibility that my greatness can fall apart at any moment. That everything I’ve built up is so fragile that one false move, one mistake, and I’ve ruined it all. Sometimes fear comes from thinking “OK, I’m brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous—now what? How do I stay fabulous? Am I as fabulous today as I was yesterday? What if I do something un-fabulous?” It’s almost as if my awareness of my assets is enough to disassemble them.

It can take a lot of work to step into our own light and stay there. By stepping into our own light, we acknowledge our strengths, connections, accomplishments, and talents with calm permission and acceptance. It’s not about being better than anyone else; in fact, most people with self-esteem issues are lucky to feel equal to anyone at all. The assumption of Williamson, and many others in the field of psycho-spirituality, is that everyone—every living person—has lightness and brilliance, just waiting to be acknowledged. It’s there, whether we want to enjoy it or not.

Staying in our light means changing our assumptions. We want to assume we are loved for who we are, not the details of what we do. We want to assume that everyone is perfect and imperfect in unique ways and for unique reasons. We want to assume that setbacks are information guideposts and nothing more. I recently heard the quote “falling on your face is still moving forward.” Sometimes brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous people have missteps and bad days. But these mistakes don’t change anything about who we are at the core.

It can be as hard to see in bright light as it is to see in total darkness, but our eyes adjust accordingly, and the view is miraculous once we get used to it. So shine, play big, and stay connected to your inner greatness. Onward!

Nancy Goodman is a licensed counselor with an emphasis on life and career coaching. Nancy can be contacted at 208-406-3234 or goodnanc@yahoo.com. http://vocatusidaho.blogspot.com.